{"id":438,"date":"2017-10-30T20:21:35","date_gmt":"2017-10-31T00:21:35","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.dremadeoraich.com\/dremadeoraich\/?p=438"},"modified":"2017-10-30T20:21:35","modified_gmt":"2017-10-31T00:21:35","slug":"writing-on-eggshells","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.dremadeoraich.com\/index.php\/2017\/10\/30\/writing-on-eggshells\/","title":{"rendered":"Writing On Eggshells"},"content":{"rendered":"

Gods know I hate to offend people or step on their toes. So it upsets me to find that something I\u2019ve posted on social media or something I\u2019ve said in passing was hurtful. That\u2019s not to say I haven\u2019t on rare occasion given voice to a sentiment I knew would be hurtful. I\u2019m only human, and I do have a temper. I can think of a handful of times where I felt the situation warranted bald truth and did not hold back. But in all those cases, the recipient of my verbal barbs knew without a doubt that my words were intentional. Most of those individuals are no longer in my life, and I am better off without them.<\/p>\n

More often, my offenses are unintentional either because I didn\u2019t think before I spoke\/wrote, or because it never occurred to me that my words could possibly be interpreted as affronts. Areas of sensitivity seem to be multiplying by leaps and bounds in recent years, or maybe they\u2019ve always been there and we are only now being made aware of them. I try to be mindful of words and phrases that exacerbate the disempowerment of women, racist mindset, gender or sexuality bias, or dialogue that might trigger victims of violence. I make every effort to speak inclusively of people with differing physical or intellectual capacities, and to be mindful of class or cultural bias in my imagery.<\/p>\n

But I have to admit that it\u2019s hard to keep up sometimes with all the \u201cproper\u201d terms for addressing these issues, almost as hard as it is to successfully dance around all the potentials for upset. I suppose that is a testament to my privilege. While I am a woman, and can speak first-hand about the struggles women face every day, I am cis-gender, with white skin, of at least average intelligence. I am unhampered by long-term illness or chronic pain or other debilitating physical conditions. I\u2019m not financially wealthy, but I have a roof over my head, food in my belly, a working vehicle and a steady job. I have good medical insurance, so I\u2019m able to see a doctor when I need one and obtain necessary medications. I want for very little, but I am keenly aware that my good fortune is not as common as we might wish. No matter how careful I am, it is far too easy for me to inadvertently say or write something wrong without realizing it until the offense has already been given.<\/p>\n

Fiction, at least, allows the writer an opportunity to wield a seemingly careless bludgeon with the hands of an unlikable character. It isn\u2019t the writer\u2019s words or actions the reader will detest; it\u2019s the villain\u2019s. Even a protagonist can demonstrate a failure to display \u201cproper\u201d or \u201chonorable\u201d actions, as long as they redeem themselves in some other way. Behind the fa\u00e7ade of fictional tales, writers can say indelicate things in poignant or impactful ways, address sensitive issues in relevant ways without taking too big a hit from readers. We almost expect that sort of thing in a story that isn\u2019t real<\/em>. Look at the old Star Trek episodes (even Next Gen, or some of the other variations of the franchise). Most of them weren\u2019t even subtle in their \u201chidden\u201d messages.<\/p>\n

Writers of non-fiction, however, have no such shield. They must weigh every word against intent and guess at the reception, then forge ahead and hope for the best. Unfortunately, the outcome is not always everything they wanted\u2014sometimes far less. Even the simplest of statements can easily be taken out of context and become fodder for insult, whether or not it was ever intended as such.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve written in a prior post about how to pen lifestyles unlike my own experience. There, I was mostly concerned with creating a realistic character portrayal. Here I\u2019m asking a different set of questions:<\/p>\n